Where are you?
In a non slutty way
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
