Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
