Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
