You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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