No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
