we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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