Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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