They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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