I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
