I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Randomize
