hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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