Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
