The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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