How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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