Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
