So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize