your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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