You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
And then my night got REAL pukey
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
