Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
