There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
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