I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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