so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
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