She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
