What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
