I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
