the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
