Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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