Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
