The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize
