you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
