sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
