why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
