I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
