I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
