Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
