Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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