I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
