on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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