Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
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