so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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