How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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