Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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