i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Randomize
