for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
