I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
