y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
