are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
