2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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