In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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