I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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