You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
