I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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